Thursday, February 12, 2015

Rant Time on the phrase "Just wait until you have kids..."

We all know how unpleasant I find it, when people make the constant remark of "Are you pregnant?". I'm pretty sure this one has come up in rants' past. But just a refresher:

  • Just because you are at childbearing age, it is possible to be tired - and not be with child.
  • Just because you are at childbearing age, it is possible to be nauseated - and not be with child.
  • Just because you are at childbearing age, it is possible to lose your keys - and not be with child.
  • Just because you are at childbearing age, it is possible to not want a glass of wine - and not be with child.
  • Just because you are childbearing age, and you have any one symptom - it doesn't mean you're frigging pregnant!!

Now that we have that cleared up. :)

Here's the other comment I find almost on a daily basis. (when I'm not being asked when I'm planning on getting pregnant, or why I don't have kids yet, and when am I going to have kids...)

"Just wait until you have kids"

Allow me to use this in a sentence, to clarify.

Me: "Wow, I did not sleep well last night! I need extra coffee this morning"
Person: "Just wait until you have kids! Then you'll really be tired!"

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize that you had to have children in order to feel tired. I guess I'm not tired. I wonder what I was feeling when I worked night shift, and I would go 30+ hours without sleep? Hm. Couldn't have been tired, since I didn't have children!

Me: "That was an expensive grocery bill."
Person: "You think it's bad now? Just wait until you have kids!!"

Oh, do they price groceries different for people who have children? I had no idea! Yes, I realize that there are more people to buy food for when you have children, but still. Shut. Up.

Me: "Wow! I can't believe it's the end of the month already. Where does the time go?"
Person: "You think times flies now? Wait until you have kids!"

Holy crap. I've been wrong. Time just passes in slow motion. Basically nothing happens until you have kids. You're bursting at the seems with extra income, extra time, and you're so well rested!

Don't get me wrong. I give major props to all the Mom's and Dad's out there! But it is possible to have a busy life, and not have children. Because instead of that time spent tending to your children, you're finding other things to involve yourself in. Priorities are different.

Remember when you felt busy before you had kids? You were involving your time and soul into different things...

When the day comes that Ryan and I have children.....I am going to make a strong, conscious decision to NEVER respond with the "Just wait until you have kids!" comment. It's inconsiderate. I'm so sick of hearing parents (not all, but there is a large number of them out there), who complain about how difficult life is with kids.

I feel like I'm constantly listening to this broken records that states, "Once you have children, you're going to have no freedom. You won't have a relationship with your husband anymore. You're going to gain so much weight! Say goodbye to running! Say goodbye to your clean house! Say goodbye to all your hobbies! Children are going to change everything."

Children are a gift. It's a challenge. Being a parent changes your life. Get over it - stop ruining it for the people who have yet to call themselves a parent! (And remember, there are people in this world who may never be able to have children. So constantly waving that dream in their face is not helpful.) This rant is not pointed any one person. I think we all have encountered this type of negativity at some point in our lives. It's just something to ponder...

10 Tips for Ragnar

So back in February of 2013, I did my 1st Ragnar. And after finishing, I was completely bewildered. When asked, "Will you do another one", I didn't have a solid answer. But I was weighing heaving on the side of "HELL-to-the-NO". 30 hours, 3 runs, no sleep, stuck in a van, cold, tired, hungry, $200+....sign me up!!

I have friends who compare Ragnar's to childbirth. It's painful. It is misery. But it is so exhilarating...and 1 year after the fact, you're pining for another one!

I've done a lot of hard workouts in my life. Believe me, I'm kind of crazy. But nothing has made me shed tears and go into full blown sobs, like passing off the paton on your 3rd run of a Ragnar. You are so exhausted, experienced so much, seen so many sights, and tested your abilities. It's just awesome.

This is especially tough for the girl who has a very strict regimen of being in bed by 9pm every night, lights out no later than 9:30 pm.

But here we go again! I'm telling you, if I can do this - anyone can! It's tough - but it is so different from anything else you'll ever do! It's especially amazing if you have a good team.

So here we go - Ragnar #4!

This time Ryan and I are team captains. And let me tell you, there is quite a bit of coordination involved.

Here are a 10 tips about preparing for a Ragnar, because I think by now we've got it down.

  1. Find more than 12 people. If you have 18 people interested in your team? Great! Because guess what? Come race will have 12, maybe 13, paid runners. Life happens, work gets crazy, family members get sick, childcare falls through, people get injured. I have never seen a Ragnar where we haven't lost at least 3 people during the planning process!
  2. When determining who runs which leg, have people put in their requests. Don't assign a leg of the race until that person's check is in your hands. (In our past races, there has been mild drama over the different legs. This makes it easy, and there will be no preferential treatment)
  3. When deciding which legs to run, keep in mind who will be in your van. Ragnar race is a team of 12. 2 vans. 6 runners to each van.
  4. If you can, I highly advise getting a hotel in a middle-point of the race if possible. It increases the cost. But so worth it. Think about running 3 times in 30 hours, sitting in a van, with no shower. Having a "base" to go  back to, so you can shower, lay down, and eat is heaven. It's also nice to have a place to keep your stuff! At Napa we had to carry all our luggage in the van. It got very crowded.
  5. Try to get vans. Our 1st year, we used SUV's that we happened to have, in order to save $$. It saved us a whopping $35/person. Mini vans are practical, there is much more room for stretching out your legs, more charging stations for cell phones, and no one gets stuck sitting in the middle of the bench. (I have now found a positive for "the mini-van".)
  6. Eat real food. Immediately after your run, if possible. When you are running every 8 hours, and on the road, people tend to live off trail mix, PB, and cliff bars. You will want to barf. I have a very sensitive running stomach. But have found if I eat right after my run - I'm okay. Subway was a heaven-sent.
  7. Make a pace chart. We make an excel spreadsheet, where we take the miles with the pace to estimate what time each person will be passing off the paton. It helps tremendously!
  8. Your team makes the race. Every Ragnar I've done, I've been blessed to have easy-going, calm, fun, happy people in my vans. I've heard horror stories, though. If there is a strong personality, or a princess in your van, it's going to be a LONG 30 hours! (Princess who gets their way + sleep deprived + extended time in van = Ragnar hell)
  9. Train. The hardest part of Ragnar is running on sore, fatigued muscles. By your 3rd run, everything hurts.  
  10. Remember to have fun! All the details in organizing the race, the sleep deprivation, muscle soreness - it's easy to get wrapped up in the tasks. Stop worrying about your pace. Stop stressing. This race is all about 30 hours filled with nothing but silliness and running! Nothing else. You don't get a medal for having stellar pace. (unless all 12 people on your team are super fast)
And to close this out, here are a few fun snapshots from Ragnar's past.....

 #1 Ragnar del Sol - 2013 (Wickenburg to Tempe, AZ 202 miles)

As you can see, we chose to dress rather bright that year :)

#2 Ragnar Napa - San Francisco to Calistoga, CA (204 miles)
 This is probably my favorite running picture ever. My friend Sharon and I decided to run the bridge (it was actually Ryan's leg). Such a cool memory!! Lot's of energy!
We took a pause to do a "couples photo"

#3 Trail Ragnar - McDowell Mountain
This was by far the most fun and badass races I've done!