So today I'm not delivering a recipe (although I'm due for one). I'm not talking about running. I come to you with a rant. (Hence the name of my blog). I am not going to apologize in advance. However, I will place a warning. Some may find this a senstive subject. Some may think I'm being rude. I also want any people who know my on a person-basis to know I'm not directing this at any one person.
In fact, as I deliver my disclaimer, I pray that maybe this turns a light bulb on. I hope this knocks some common sense. I hope this teaches some God-forsaken common courtesy. You know, manners. (Here comes the sass)
I start by asking a simple question. Have you ever been sick? Have you ever felt so sick that all you yearn to do is lay your head down...be it a pillow, a germ-infested-stiff-moldy-airport chair, or a bathroom floor? You don't feel like talking about it, because all you want to do is lay down.
Now imagine feeling that way because you have the flu, you have a raging sinus infection, maybe you are coming down with acute appendicitis, or pancreatitis? Now imagine your response from those around you is a big cheesey smile, and "Uh-ohhhh!! Somebody's pregnant!!"
*Insert middle finger here*
NEWS FLASH TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. IT IS, BELIEVE IT OR NOT, POSSIBLE FOR A WOMAN OF THE CHILDBEARING AGE TO COME DOWN WITH THE COMMON COLD OR INFLUENZA OR OTHER ILLNESS AND NOT BE PREGNANT.
Initially it was funny. I would smile, and politely respond with "No, funny" (in my head I'd be saying *No, asshole*) But there's a point where it goes too far.
Me: "I had the flu that's going around this weekend, it was horrible."
Coworker: "Uh ohhh!! Somebody's pregnant!"
Yes, the contagious case of gastroenteritis that is rampantly spreading through the community hit me, but before it hit me -- it said "You won't get the flu, you will be pregnancy!"
Coworker: "Abby, I brought donuts for everyone! They're in the breakroom. Why aren't you eating one?"
Me: "Actually, I'm not really hungry. But thank you, that was so sweet of you!"
Coworker: "Uh ohhhhh, you're not hungry?!?! You don't have an appetite?!?! Somebody's pregnant!!!"
Or I could just not like donuts. Or I could have eaten breakfast before coming to work. I could just not want to have a mid morning desert of a deep friend piece of bread coated in sugar and jelly.'
Angry, over-emotional, cynical may be words that could describe me right now. But it is really hard being a 20-something, married woman, who doesn't have children yet. I can't go to a family reunion without being repetitively asked about "Why don't you have babies?" I can't go to work without getting asked, "When are you going to have babies?". I can't meet new people, without getting asked "Do you have kids? Why not? When are you going to have them?"
DO PEOPLE HAVE THIS PICTURE IN THEIR MIND THAT ALL YOUNG MARRIED PEOPLE DO IS HAVE SEX AND MAKE BABIES?! What if I had cancer of my reproductive organs? What if we were experiencing infertility? What if life was just a little too crazy to start having children with us starting our careers, planning on applying for grad school soon, Ryan going to pilot school (and us being separated for essentially 2 years? Or what if we are in our 20's, and want to enjoy our youth a little before we drastically change our lives?
The point is, it's our business. It's our family. And it's not anyones place to judge or pressure. I don't mind being asked once. But repetitively being pressured is abusive. And rude.
People can just be sick. Young women can just get the flu. Did you know that? Did you know that non-child-bearing people get stomach aches, and colds, and decreased appetite, and urinary frequency because they drank too much coffee?
This is just an educational session, really. ;)
Before I sign out, I do have to share that as I read this to my husband before posting. His response was as follows:
"Haha! Wow, that's very emotional, Abby. Are you pregnant?!" (he knows me too well)
Have a ranty day! And I promise I'll be sweeter next time I grace this page with my presence.