Last Night's Horror Scene

 Dear Baby Namaste,

**Warning, moderately graphic and mildly offensive story ahead** But this is how I cope with discomfort...finding humor in it.

I return to letters to you, after my pause to discuss all things career-related and school. Your mama has had quite a day, but as long as I stay super distracted, nausea seems to stay away. So I am writing to you to continue my distraction. 

I write this letter to you as a lesson, and maybe someday you'll wake up on the wrong side of the bed and want to throw up your hands and say "forget this day!". And I can tell you, don't. Don't let those first few minutes dictate your attitude for the whole day. 

I have a pretty solid example for you. And I think it also is proof of how much I already love you.

Of all the things in this world your mom avoids and hates, it is vomiting. She would rather sit in fetal position feeling nauseated for days before she chooses to just throw up. 

Yesterday was a tough day. I was nauseated and queasy all day. I had back-to-back Skype meetings all day and several I was leading. I kept having to put myself on mute and excuse myself from the meeting.

And finally...it all came to "fruition" at approximately 2am this morning when I found myself reenacting that scene of the spinning head and green bile from "The Exorcism of Emily Rose". 

(actual footage of me last night at 2 am...)

And just when I thought things couldn't get worse...out of the corner of my tear-filled eyes I saw Mr. Cricket creeping across our very small "water closet" headed in my direction (our toilet is closed off separate from the rest of our master bathroom).

(actual size of the cricket in our bathroom last night) 

This is when Ryan heard my heaving, crying, and muttering, and he said "I'm so sorry babe, is there anything I can do for you?" And I muttered "Kill this thing! Kill it! Help me!! HELLLLP"

It was instantaneous that he was in the bathroom to see what was going on. Clearly, he assumed I had lost my mind. I had no shoe, or hard device to kill the cricket (my usual weapon). Just a bath towel that I repetitively smashed on the cricket while I simultaneously dry-heaved my guts out. 

I was successful in killing the little bastard. We all were wide awake (including a very curious Golden Retriever). But, I felt better. 

So how much do I love you, Baby Namaste? I love you enough to kill a bug while dry heaving in the midst of the night :D. 

And when my alarm to go run went off at 4:30am, my initial response was "Screw that! I want to sleep until the baby is born". But I pulled myself out of bed, ate a piece of toast, and headed out for some fresh air and exercise. 

I ended up having a really productive day at work, a promising visit to the perinatologist, and I was able to get several hours of homework accomplished! 

I'm really glad I didn't let those 1st waking moments dictate my whole day. Sometimes you need to just brush yourself off and move forward. 

But I am going to make your Dad do a thorough bug-check tonight before we go to bed, so I don't repeat last night's drama. 

With Love,

The Expelling Exterminator