Dear Sleep,
My distant dear friend, I know we have become distanced over the last 7 months. In fact, I don't believe we have spent more than 3 hours together since February 12. (For I didn't sleep the nights leading up to labor). Please keep in touch and, while we don't spend as much time together anymore, I'd like to rekindle our relationship at your soonest convenience.
Truth be told...It's not you, it's me. Actually...it's not you...it's Maddy. :D
We have reached a level of sleep deprivation that one morning this weekend I woke up to myself talking. Apparently, I had been telling Ryan (repetitively) "I don't understand why she's already awake. Why isn't she sleeping." And he was trying to explain to me that she was, indeed, asleep. He even had our Owlet camera pulled up to show me.
It was very confusing for both of us because I was talking in my sleep, and neither of us was aware...
And that's how tired I am. I don't feel tired during the day. Until I sit down. In fact, I have fallen asleep nursing Maddy at 2pm many days recently.
I write this letter as a reminder. Some day Madelyn will be a teenager. I probably will be lying awake in the wee hours of the night worrying about her and the boy she's been talking to, or the crop tops she's trying to wear to school. And maybe I'll yearn for those simpler baby days, where her middle-of-the-night issues were easily "fixed" with a boob in the mouth or some rocking and shushing.
But in the meantime, don't run far and don't give up on me. I'd like to rekindle our relationship soon.
Best Regards,
Tired Mom
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