Rants, Recipes, and Running

   I haven't blogged much - but the last time I did one of these, Maddy was 9 months old. It's really fun looking back on the things that were "stressors" to me at that time. Prior to that - my currently post was a pregnancy edition.  So here goes May 2022. Maddy is almost a 15-month old and summer has set ablaze here in Tucson.   Reading :  I really wish I had a better answer for this one, but I have not been the best about reading lately. The only book I'm reading is "How to talk to your kids so they'll listen and listen so they'll talk". It is really good. Most of the book is geared more to school-aged kids, in my opinion. But it highlights some great communication skills with children to help them trust you as a parent to be open and honest. Eating: All the smoothies. It has been getting really hot here - and every day when we get home from our stroller run I make a smoothie for Maddy with whole milk, Fage, and fruit - and then a smoothie for...

 One of the things I really wanted to get down in writing was a post about weaning, as I've been feeling all the feels this week as she hit this "milestone".  I know I've alluded to this in the past on this blog, but breastfeeding was not easy for me in the beginning. We spent about 3 weeks of her not actually transferring enough milk (I had no idea), her becoming quite underweight, introducing formula & pumped milk in bottles, and then having weeks of her literally screaming at my breast and refusing to latch. Alas around 7 weeks we got the right help from a IBCLC in town - and finally by the time Maddy was about 10 weeks old she was exclusively breastfeeding. We had to use a system called an SNS (supplemental nursing system) - where you use a tiny syringe, fill it with milk, tape the catheter to your breast, and slip it in their mouth while you attempt to latch them. It is tedious & messy - but it is extremely beneficial in teaching them how to nurse.  I wou...

I haven't blogged in a really long time and I was thinking about this the other day. But figured I'd do a little life update on here. Ryan and I were talking about amusement parks the other evening and he thought I had never been to one with him. He said "your memory of Six Flags with a guy must have been a college or high school boyfriend. We haven't gone together"  So I busted open this blog - and referenced a post from 2013 when we were stationed in San Antonio and walla! I proved him wrong :D  That led me to realize this blog is really nice. While facebook/instagram is a great place to hold pictures with random captions about the day. My blog really demonstrates a little more feeling to it all.  I wish I had been better about blogging throughout Maddy's 1st year of life. But here are I am.  We've been a little busy since my last post in October. Since October we have -Gotten settled into our cabin -Sold our house  -Bought a new house  -Moved -Acquired ...

    Reading :  I'm just going to say nothing. I can't seem to stick with a book these days. And when I try to read I fall asleep. :( I'm hoping this weekend up at the cabin to find a book to enjoy. Thinking: about color schemes for the next house. It is very modern with white cabinets and gray vinyl flooring. I am deciding between grays/whites or Navy/white with gold accents. I feel like everyone decorates in gray/white these days (including me) - so it would be a neat little accent! Feeling: Excited! As the last post revealed - we have a lot of exciting things going on with the move. Anticipating : Completion of the inspection of our current home so we can start packing. Of course, Ryan is out of town all week next week so it will be tough as I have to do a lot of the packing solo. I sure am glad I don't work full time. I'd lose my mind! Working :  Still about 10-12 hours/week. However with the move coming up, I'll probably back down. We also have a home with ...

We have had an "itch" over the last 2 years that we keep thinking about scratching. Every few weeks, one of us would crack an obscene joke about wanting to sell our house and move into a home that is easier to maintain. Then we would follow that up with sending each other homes in the area we would find on zillow. Then about 3 weeks ago we had a serious conversation about the thing we keep talking about. " What would life look like if we sold our current home, moved into more of a neighborhood, and simplified our lives a bit. "  I'm writing about this to hopefully some day look back at this with confidence saying "we made the right choice"... We love our current home. It is beautiful, unique, and tranquil. We are almost self-sustaining with a large garden, hens, and an orchard of fruit trees which we (mostly Ryan) built from nothing.There is a sparkling pool and several seating areas for entertaining and enjoying the mountain views.  Our lives are ins...

 Well, I missed month 1-8. But it is never too late to begin, right? Here is a recap of Maddy at 8 months. (I'm totally stealing this idea from my sister, Lisa. I thought it was so neat that she recaps her son's favorites and happenings every month)   How am I sleeping? Better than I was - but not as good as my peers. It also depends on if I'm teething. Last week, her 2nd tooth was poking through - so she was awake 3 times.  No matter how much I let her cry it out, I cannot seem to cut down her feedings. When I go in there - she is literally pulling at my shirt with her mouth wide open. So clearly she's hungry.  She eats 2 times/night and luckily goes right back to sleep. It is what it is. What am I eating? While we have had breastfeeding and bottle refusal struggles - I am so glad that taking to food as been relatively smooth. We are doing baby led weaning, and Maddy really enjoys most every food I've given her.  Her favorite foods are scrambled eggs, appl...

 Dear Sleep, My distant dear friend, I know we have become distanced over the last 7 months. In fact, I don't believe we have spent more than 3 hours together since February 12. (For I didn't sleep the nights leading up to labor). Please keep in touch and, while we don't spend as much time together anymore, I'd like to rekindle our relationship at your soonest convenience.  Truth be told...It's not you, it's me. Actually...it's not you...it's Maddy. :D We have reached a level of sleep deprivation that one morning this weekend I woke up to myself talking. Apparently, I had been telling Ryan (repetitively) "I don't understand why she's already awake. Why isn't she sleeping." And he was trying to explain to me that she was , indeed, asleep. He even had our Owlet camera pulled up to show me. It was very confusing for both of us because I was talking in my sleep, and neither of us was aware... And that's how tired I am. I don't f...

 I went through my old posts - and it was funny seeing the last time I did this in February, I started it off by saying "This is my last Currently post before being a Mom". Well...here I am. A Mom.  It's funny how much I've changed since February 12, 2021 :)   Reading :  The Wife Between Us. It's a psychological thriller and it's been a nice and easy read. I actually had to put it down the other night because the foreshadowing was getting too scary for me. Thinking: About some new "career"-ish endeavors. I had some significant struggles with breastfeeding the 1st 3 months of motherhood. Recently a friend sent her niece my way who was struggling, and I was actually able to help her out and it was very rewarding. I'm looking into becoming a La Leche League advocate - which is a volunteer role. I could take things a step further eventually, and become a lactation consultant (maybe once our children are older and school aged). So for now...this volun...

I've been in a bit of a haze over the past 7 months. I wouldn't say I'm out of the haze. But I'm coming up for air.  Let me bullet point-style and unload my soul. As I feel these are pivotal life moments that need to be documented somewhere... Maddy had growth issues. I had breastfeeding issues. It took many pediatrician appointments, 6 lactation consultant appointments, Gallons of tears, and so many prayers - but somehow Madelyn has gone from being in the 1st percentile to the 13th percentile as an exclusively breastfed baby. If our next baby has issues - I am going to come back to this bullet point as a reminder. It took work. It took a supportive husband. It took professional help. It took many text messages and phone calls to my sisters, Mom, and some good mama friends. But...we got there.  We have had some awesome family visits - my parents stayed here for 2 weeks after Madelyn was born, my brother Kevin and his family came in April, Ryan's sister Erin came in ...

On February 15 at 2:33 pm we welcomed our beautiful, sweet, little baby Madelyn Claire into this world. I better document this story before it gets hazy in my mind during these busy, sleepless newborn days.  We checked into the hospital at 9pm on her due date to be induced- Valentine's Day! We joked about how this is a Valentine's Day we will never forget ;)  Why did I get induced? My OB doesn't like you to go too far past your due date. And I just had this feeling that this was a good choice. In hindsight, we are really glad I went with my gut as she did have meconium in the amniotic fluid! So she was ready to go.  The induction method was using this cervical tablet that is inserted to help with effacement and then we would start pitocin. My birth plan was to try to go without an epidural, if possible. But I was realistic that this may change as things progress. Especially with pitocin... Within 30 minutes of receiving the tablet, the contractions started firing. I worke...

Alright 3rd trimester running recap! Here we go!  I am getting induced in a few hours (eek!), I'm 40 weeks, and I had my final run this morning...so I can safely say I am DONE pregnant running (until next time...) Again, I expect no one to read this.  This is sort of my "diary" to look back on next pregnancy.  What was different about 3rd Trimester from 2nd trimester? The sore calves really kicked in around 30 weeks! Which makes sense...b/c I am carrying more weight than my body is used to. That was really the only discomfort I experienced running.  Weekly avg mileage & pace? Pre-Pregnancy "avg" Road Pace:  7:45/mile Pre-Pregnancy Road half marathon pace:  7:00/mile Pre-Pregnancy Tempo Pace:  6:45/mile "Avg" Road Pace 1st Tri:  8:40/mile (but it is also averaging 85 degrees + 60% humidity every morning)  Tempo Pace 1st Tri:  7:30/mile (but I can hold it for very long because it's so hot) Avg Road Pace 2nd Tri:  8:20/mile (notice...

"She will come when she is ready" The most annoying phrase of the week.  Thank you for your wise insight. I had no idea that was how this whole pregnancy, labor, and delivery concept works.  Also, when someone is sleeping about 4 hours/night for the past week - telling them "she will come when she's ready" is so therapeutic. I was tired, uncomfortable, impatient, and anxious... But now I feel s o much better knowing such valuable information.  ( Ha! :D )  Okay okay, I'll end my rant. You know I have to rant. I know these comments of insightful and wise advice aren't meant to be annoying. But, they are annoying.  I've been pregnant for 39 weeks and 5 days, my house is 100% ready for a baby, I'm not sleeping well - and I am very aware that babies come when they are ready.  And just to add, I've heard this from a handful of friends/colleagues this week. I never once asked them "when is this baby going to come?". this has been their re...

My last "Currently" post before becoming a Mom!    Reading :  The Dutch House by Ann Patchett  My sister recommended this book and author to me. I loved The Patron Saint of Liars so much, I decided to read another Ann Patchett book.  Thinking : About labor. I'm planning on a natural childbirth with no epidural. But every birth story someone tells me makes me afraid. Also, one of the you tube videos I watched about "natural labor pain management" the lady said she lost consciousness 3 times during labor because the pain was so intense.  Um, you should get off YouTube, lady :D Ha! Feeling:  Surprisingly good! I don't really have any major "complaints" at this point. I mean, I don't sleep the best and I'm ready to not be pregnant. But I don't really have any aches/pains/issues. I feel I paid my dues in the 1st trimester with all that vomiting. I did my fair share of whining during that phase. Anticipating : The moment I start to feel contr...

 As my due date approaches within the next 2 weeks..the advice has been coming in strong from multiple angles. And holy crap, is it ever overwhelming. "Let the baby cry it out" "Don't let them cry, they are a new born - they need your love" "Nurse your baby to sleep." "Whatever you do...do not nurse your baby to sleep! This creates bad habits." "Pump so dad can bottle-feed." "Don't pump until you have to, or she will get confused." "Just nurse them in bed"  "Whatever you do...DO NOT nurse them in bed..." "You can breastfeed!" "Don't be so confident you'll be able to breastfeed. I wasn't able to breastfeed with any of mine. Not everyone can do it..." "You're awfully small. Are you sure they have your due date correct?"  "You don't let ready to deliver in 2 weeks. You'll go over."  Ha! My response to all of it is "Oh thank you for th...

 While most of this blog since it's rebirth has been focused on "growing a watermelon" in terms of having a baby... I thought I'd take a more literal approach and do an update on the actual watermelons we grew! What is funny is that we planted our watermelon seeds back in April, and tonight we finally ate one. So that took about 9 months seed-to-table. And I'm on my 9th month of growing a baby!  Moral of the story - don't eat watermelon seeds.  We are in the midst of my absolute favorite gardening season in the Sonoran Desert -- The winter garden! (Yes, we get to garden year-round here). In the winter we grow things like: all the greens, carrots, beets, broccoli, Brussels. Right now we still are enjoying some of our long summer crops such as butternut squash, eggplant, and watermelon. Squash has a very long growing season - partly because we had such a dry summer.  Here is what we are enjoying currently via pictures :)  Here is a bowl of greens! We currently h...

How to piss off a pregnant lady in 1 simple step! Tell her how fast her pregnancy has gone!  I have heard or read those words so frequently over the last week from colleagues, friends, and a few people on social media.  They are so right. The part that's gone really fast has been the part where we have been on lockdown and my face-to-face social interaction and "outings outside the house" decreased by like 70-80%. Or perhaps the 3 months I spent on my knees in our bathroom floor dry-heaving. That was like a blink of an eye!!! Time flies when you're having fun. Or vomiting.  Okay, okay ... I'm just kidding around.  But seriously - don't tell a pregnant woman (during a pandemic) that time has just flown by because it probably hasn't for her. In seriousness, my pregnancy has gone fast in ways. And I've mostly enjoyed it and had it pretty easy! But when I look back at when I found out I was pregnant at just 5 weeks..that seriously feels like eons ago.  An...

Every year towards the end of December, I sit down and write down a "bucket list" for the year. I do that instead of resolutions or goals because it just feels more fun to check things off as the year goes on.  Well, in 2020 - I have a lofty bucket list involving different travel plans, career endeavors, and athletic accomplishments.  And then COVID happened. And then I got pregnant. So now when I read my 2020 goals, it kind of makes me giggle. While 2020 looked different than I thought it would -- it shaped out to be a pretty great year despite conditions out of our control! One thing I can't stand is making up excuses for things you didn't get done. Excuses = crutches. If you didn't accomplish something, you clearly didn't make that a priority. But this year...I think I can we can all use a"judgement-free excuse card". So here is where I came out :D  1. Run 50K -- I did that! It was January 25, prior to the world starting on fire and races shuttin...

 I haven't been writing too much about my pregnancy, because honestly, I don't have a lot to report.  At my last OB appointment, my doctor said "You're one of my most boring patients I'm seeing these days. Keep it up!" Which is the best thing I could ask for...  I'm currently 33 weeks and 2 days along. Not that anyone's counting. The baby is the size of a pineapple (those fruit comparisons make zero sense to me, by the way...).  But here are some updates that maybe I'll look back on in my future pregancies... Symptoms : Heartburn, Restless Legs, and Insomnia.  I'm having to be really careful about what I eat and when I eat - or I'm up all night with agonizing heartburn. It is not uncommon for me to be pacing the halls of our house chomping on Tums at 2am lately.  I always have wicked restless legs at night. No matter how much I stretch and try rolling out my calves - my legs seem to contort Emily Rose Exorcism style.  Ryan got me a Pregnanc...

 Many talked about how different their Christmas was this year given the pandemic, and their need to be isolated at home with no family. Fortunately or unfortunately, this Christmas was no different for me. As a nurse, I've spent most Christmases working in the hospital. As a military spouse, the last 2 years I didn't even spend Christmas with Ryan. 2018 he was deployed and 2019 he was on mandatory orders and worked the night shift through the holiday.  We live 1700 miles away from any family. So have always had to figure out a creative way to spend the holiday. As much as I love the Christmas season, the baking, the decorations, and the fun - the actual holiday is one that I have sort of come to not enjoy. I find myself in tears at some point either on Christmas Eve or Day in envy of people who get to spend holidays with their families. While we try to travel home for holidays, it has been a challenge - since we both have jobs that continue to work on holidays. So we always w...

I will pause for a brief intermission of all things baby to celebrate an exciting moment.  I am done with grad school!  This is the first evening that the reality is really settling in. For the past 2.5 years of my life, assignments were due by 9 or 10 pm Tuesday night (for me, since I'm in AZ and everything was on East Coast time)... I never waited until Tuesday to submit my assignments - but there were a few Monday nights that I was scrambling.  I got to add "MSN, RN" behind my name on my email signature today at work -  and it felt kind of cool! New letters behind the name are always fun, right?  I always wanted to get my master's, but honestly didn't think I'd actually do it.  Then while I was doing it - I had many moments where I thought about quitting.  Then I got pregnant and realized I'd be doing my practicum in the midst of the pandemic, and really thought about putting things on hold. However, I knew that if I put things on hold - that would ...